


Office Christmas Party at Reynholm Industries

by Harpyn8



Category: IT Crowd
Genre: Christmas Fluff, Computers, Gen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-12-27
Updated: 2016-12-27
Packaged: 2018-09-12 16:12:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 768
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9079972
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Harpyn8/pseuds/Harpyn8
Summary: An office Christmas party at Reynholm Industries. What can go wrong?





	

Moss and Roy were busy pretending to fix a computer under a table of a buxom accountant, freshly employed by Reynholm Industries, single and definitely not into any of the funny business with their boss, Douglas Reynholm. According to rumours, she was up to date in both DC and Marvel lore, which meant she deserved a treatment far better than the usual perfunctory "Did you try turning it off and on again?" and then rudely hanging up on her.

They were near completion, just deciding that Moss should be the one to ask her out first, when a shrill voice calling their names made them jump a little and hit their heads on the desk. It was Jen, and from their viewpoint, she seemed to have bought those overly expensive Ballink shoes after all.

"There you are, you band of lechers," she said, squatting down to get on their level. "I've been looking all over for you! We've been invited to a Christmas party this year, the entire IT department. We need to have a meeting, you won't ruin this for me. Not this year!"

"Alright," said Roy, "can you just hang on a bit, Abigail is about to return with some coffees and Moss is going to, you know," he lowered his voice to a whisper, "ask her out."

"Oh my god!" said Jen shrilly, "Abigail? The one with the... You? Ask _her_ out?" She started laughing in her usual mad witch way. 

"Roy, I'm... I think maybe this is a bad idea? I'm suddenly feeling dizzy and my ear, it feels hot. On the inside. I'm gonna go. You can ask her out if you want to." And with that, Moss got out from under the desk and hobbled off.

"Great, Jen! See what you did now?" said Roy, also getting out from under the desk, a supremely judgemental look on his face.

"Oh no!" she cried, "Moss! Wait!" And just like that she was off too.

Roy thought for a second about staying and doing the thing Moss told him to do, but then he realized that would be a betrayal of his and Moss' friendship. And also, that Moss was supposed to ask her first, then she say "no" and _then_ Roy would ask her, to which she would have to say yes because he's much more handsome than Moss, much more manly. In his opinion.

He went to the basement after that torturous half a second of deliberation.

 

In the basement, Moss and Jen were participating in something curiously alike to a staring contest. She had her patented compassionate look on her face, he looked as if all of his equations' left sides refused to cooperate with the right sides. 

"Anyway," Roy decided to put a stop to this uncomfortable silence. "Anyway, what was it about your party?"

Jen's face brightened in every aspect. "Yes, the Christmas party! I want you both there, in your best clothes and acting like normal people."

"Is that all?" said Roy, looking at Moss, he was playing with some figurines now.

"No, that's not all! I am serious, Roy! You two need to start pulling your weight around here, socially speaking. I need you to be sociable, I need you to behave!"

Not that again, Roy thought. You set fire to one Christmas tree and Moss tries to extinguish it with champagne, and you're suddenly the barbarian of the piece! "So I got drunk last time and an accident happened! So we didn't get invited for the past three years, big deal!" he went behind his desk, to pretend he was working. Like he cared, parties were not his or Moss' scene.

"I want to go," said Moss. "Abigail will be there."

"What?" said Roy. "But you said you give up on her!"

"You didn't... ask her out?"

"No, but that's not the point."

"Good, I want another chance. I want to give her another chance with this god-like body and my sweet style."

"Alright," said Roy. They were back on.

Jen, however was still there. "You two will behave then?" she said, watching them with her two cold eyes like snakes in the mist.

"Yeah," said Roy, "We'll behave. For Moss, not you. He deserves a party, living the way he does, like a monk, a high-tech monk of the 21st century, living surrounded by circuit boards and cables and blinking lights..."

"Alright, spare me. I'll be in my office, taking my deserved nap."

And so the thing was settled. The IT crowd were to appear at a Christmas party. God help them all, thought Moss.


End file.
